She has taken out private health insurance that covers her for assisted pregnancy, and has started researching sperm donation. It's all she's been talking about for months and it was during one of these conversations that she told me I should look into it as well. I think it's a bit pessimistic for her to be allowing for eternal spinsterhood at the age of thirty-two but I Googled it anyway, merely for analytical purposes you understand, and was pleasantly surprised by what I found...mostly.
There are two options for women who wish to 'receive' (*immature snicker*) donor sperm in this country; shop direct or go on Se-Bay (Ha! See what I did there?). Both options cost about the same (on average $400.00-$600.00), but two things stood out to me about the latter. The first was that the sites I looked at felt eerily similar to dating sites - a long time bug bear of mine, as everyone knows. Each guy gave a detailed description of his physical attributes, his occupation, and his relationship status, but if you wanted to see what your potential Baby Daddies looked like, you'd have to pay to gain access to his pictures. The going rate is anywhere from $100.00-$200.00, and bear in mind that's before you proceed to the checkout. When you do decide upon a candidate, it isn't just a matter of typing in your MasterCard digits and pressing ship - there are more decisions to be made! If you want a 'Clean' sample, you will need to shell out around $600.00, whereas if you're content with an 'unclean' sample, you'll receive a $200.00 discount. What bothers me about this is that the sites don't elaborate on what they mean by Clean or Unclean. Given that we live in the real world, I'm going to go ahead and assume that they don't mean untested, leading me to conclude that the vessel containing the precious essence is delivered to your door as is - from stable to table, as it were.
Will someone out there with expertise in this arena please tell me I'm wrong about this?
All in all, apart from the aforementioned concerns, I have no objection whatsoever to self insemination - on the contrary; I think it's a fantastic idea, and am glad I live in a world where people don't have to take their love with them when they die. I still think my friend is prematurely conceding (pun intended), but as for myself, it's starting to sound like an attractive idea if I'm still alone in a year or so. Does anyone else have any thoughts about it?
Until my next post, I'll just be sitting here on the couch in scuba gear, bracing myself for the tidal wave of opinions.