While en route home with my son from Comic Con last
Sunday, I overheard a conversation in which I was eager to participate. However, as the train in which we were
travelling operated on a notorious South East Melbourne line, and the people
conversing were typical of the passengers who travel on said line, judging by
their language and demeanour, I decided that there was a time and a place for
honesty. What follows is an abridged transcript
of this conversation, and what would have been my response had I not grown so
accustomed to sporting my own teeth.
SKINNY
BLONDE IN EMINEM SHIRT: Brie was goin’
mental the other night; Sam (whom I’m assuming is
her partner) really had to belt her arse
in the end. That quietened her down.
EQUALLY
SKINNY BRUNETTE/BLONDE IN FAUX ADIDAS SHIRT:
I’ll bet it did. That’s all they’re good for; beltin’ ‘em and makin’ ‘em.
S.B.I.E.S:
I could make ‘em myself, but I can’t
handle ‘em on my own. I reckon if kids
came out perfect, we wouldn’t need guys.
E.S.B/B.I.F.A.S: Yeah, but what about the fun bit?
S.B.I.E.S: That’s what vibrators are for.
Indeed.
Irrespective of the irrefutably fabulous
advancements made in reproduction and sex toy manufacturing over the last thirty
years or so, I could not disagree more with either of these ‘ladies’ sad assessment
of the male species, not that I feel sorry for any ‘man’ who corporally
disciplines a little girl. The reason
that the tone of their conversation disturbed me so much is that it sounded
eerily like conversations I overheard in my youth – conversations in which the
gender roles were reversed. How would
any self-respecting woman react to two twenty-something guys waxing lyrical on
the singular nature of women’s existence, (in laymen’s terms, asserting the
fact that women are only good for ‘one thing’)?
With anger, I suspect, and rightly so.
Why then is it now okay for women to view men in a similarly utilitarian
way? I wish I could say that this was
the first such conversation I had been privy to, but sadly it wasn’t. I can only assume that these women were
either taught to think this way, or that their opinions were forged by bitter
experience. Either way, it’s pretty
damned sad.
My mother holds a similar opinion of men, for
reasons I’ve gone into in another post, but I never subscribed to it. I couldn’t let myself. I can only imagine what life would be like if
women were indoctrinated from childhood to seek out a partner according to his
procreative and disciplinary capabilities alone. Sure, there might be a lot less single forty
year-olds in the world, (moi, for example), but I can guarantee you we would not
be any happier. Although I don’t
necessarily need one, as such, I
think the world would be a rather cold place without men, and my belief in
human nature assures me that the majority of guys feel the same way about
us.
They do in my world, anyway.
